finding fitness through grief
I have so many reasons why I am passionate about training and group fitness and how that passion turned into gym ownership.
Here is one of those reasons.
In 2016 I had a new baby and a sick father. I was in my mid-30s, with a busy career and two young children. After having my youngest, I felt this unexplanable drive to move my body, to feel stronger and more connected to my body. Maybe deep down my body knew I needed to better manage the stress of my chaotic life. Maybe I felt like I needed to set a better example for my girls. Maybe I just needed 45 minutes that were mine and mine alone. Maybe it was seeing my dad, sinking deeper and deeper into his illness. It was probably all of those things.
Whatever it was, it compelled me to pull out the flyer for HIIT YOU FIT that landed in my letterbox. I contacted the owner, Karen, and started classes. She coached classes in the guide hall around the corner from my house, and at first I could only handle one class a week. Then I bumped it up to two. I was slowly improving and beginning to lay the foundation for my health and fitness. Fun fact: Karen now coaches for us at ABT. I absolutely could not pass up the opportunity to bring her on board. If you know, you know.
I spent 2016 getting fitter and stronger and the irony was not lost of me that my dad was 10,000 miles away growing sicker and sicker. When he passed away in February 2017 at only 61 years old, my life changed forever.
Among the many ways his death impacted me, one that I was not expecting was my turbo-charged determination to prioritise my health. I became laser-focused on doing whatever it took to secure my own healthy future. A part of my brain snapped, and I locked in on building the best quality of life I could.
My training became the foundation for everything that followed - my unwavering commitment to training, my curiosity to move my body in fun and interesting ways (obstacle racing! bouldering! pole dancing!) and my eventual pursuit of a group fitness certification.
An even more unexpected side effect of his death was how much exercise helped me through the grief process. Training helped me through one of the darkest periods in my life in ways I never thought possible.
In those dark, early days after dad died, I used training as a balm to soothe the ache of the loss. I left every class feeling better and less depressed than I did when I went in - thanks endorphins! And training made me feeling I had control of something in a period when it felt like the ground had been ripped out from beneath me.
Dad had been an athlete in his younger years - a competitive junior surfer and then in his teens, his efforts at 10m platform diving secured him a college scholarship. And all those years later, I felt like training like an athlete brought me closer to him. The comfort it gave me was a welcome surprise.
I am so grateful to have exercise, and group fitness in particular, as something I can lean on to help me manage my grief. It’s also way to channel that sadness in a positive way, to put my energy into something that would benefit me not only immediately but also for years and years to come. I have learned firsthand how it can change us in ways we least expect it. So when the opportunity arose to bring a gym to the community that would bring people together to train in a welcoming, friendly space, I jumped in head first.